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Ways to make crack cocaine pro#

Place your lips on the opposite end of the tube. Keep the tube tilted back, just to be safe. Go ahead and light your lighter, and run it over the rock a few times to melt it to the brillo. You'll want to keep the tube tilted back at this point, so that your crack doesn't spill on the floor. You can safely ignore the one sitting on the table for now. No, you fool, the brillo pad inside the tube. Go ahead and grab yourself a decent sized rock. Insert this piece of brillo pad into the tube, so that it rests just a few millimeters from the lip. This will act as your filter, since inhaling molten cocaine isn't very much fun. You'll then want to cut off a piece of brillo pad about an inch long, and thick enough to fit snugly in the tube. If you aren't able to find a tire gauge for some reason, the little glass tubes that they sell fake roses in at gas stations will work in a pinch. Go ahead and pull everything off of the tire gauge, saving only the metal tube. If you're going to smoke something named after a part of your ass, you should at least do it right. But I figure that since smoking crack is pretty stupid to begin with, if you're smoking it wrong, you're going to look like a real idiot. Smoking crack fits right in with my theory that the use of cocaine as anything other than a local anesthetic is a serious waste of time, money, and dopamine.

Doesn't bode too well for the act of actually smoking crack, now does it? On top of that, regardless of what anyone's uncle has to say about it, it really isn't that much fun. " He must be smoking crack" has become a slang term for someone who is acting in an unintelligent and irrational manner. Jah is your co-pilot, never forget that, mon!īefore I get started on this little tutorial, I would like to say that smoking crack is really lame.

Ways to make crack cocaine pro#

Living the life of a pro crackhead is very good karma! Chances are, you'll be reincarnated as a white rhino or some other endangered species, ripe for extinction.

You will die eventually, but don't worry.

If you ever do desert your dealer, you better steer clear! Chances are, he's got a Mosberg pump or something like that, and he's waiting to stuff it down your throat and go KABOOM!.

If your dealer runs outta product, dont fret! Just hang outside his house for a few hours until he either shoots you or comes cricket with some yum yum!

NEVER EVER EVER leave your dealer for another, unless he's got better stuff, for cheaper, at that.

See Step 1 for further reference, you moooron! You must be willing to do the dealer's bidding always! He wants a new deck for his car? Sure! No problem! Blowjob for a dub! Anytime, sir! This is of key importance, since you'll be a pro cracksmoker, you must act as such.

Next, devote yourself to your dealer wholeheartedly.

Namely: Everything you're not, that's why you're smoking crack, right? Your dealer should be smart (or at least appear as such), confident, and pursuasive. This is very important because if you don't have a dealer from which to leech psychic energy, then you'll be just another mediocre crackhead.